With summer finally here we can see everything in nature around us growing, thriving and blooming. Plants, flowers, birds, insects and all kinds of animals are busy and it feels like a relief for all of us after a long winter and spring.
We sometimes approach the weather and our lives as though they should always be sunny, but I think that nature better reflects our psychology. You can think of your life as having its own “autumn” and “winter” when things need to settle and you need to consolidate, and a “spring” and “summer” when things expand and there is a sense of newness.
These seasons go in cycles throughout your life and play by the same laws of nature – you cannot control them, you are far better off accepting them and making the most of what they offer. They don’t just last for three months at a time – they can vary both in length and intensity.
Not having control can be challenging, because even though we may have plans for our lives, there will be moments when things just don’t happen as we wish them to – times when we feel we should be further forward than we are.
It can be easy in these periods to feel very alone, but actually you are not. Societal expectations of how fast we should do things, of what we should achieve and how our lives should look, and social media illusions of how wonderful everything is for other people, and how much they are progressing in work or life, can be stifling.
Just because the rest of the world seems like or looks like it is moving forward, it’s often an illusion. More importantly, it doesn’t mean you have to be moving forward right now – maybe you are in a “winter life phase”.
Identifying these “life seasons” and understanding how best to work with them can benefit our health and wellbeing.
Spring
This “life season” is all about initiating change in your life. Maybe you have had the same old patterns recurring over and over again and have realised enough is enough and that you want something to be different.
It might relate to what you are doing at work, your relationship, your friendships, your daily habits or how you talk to yourself.
Spring as a life season is about taking time to reset, thinking about what you want to change and sowing those seeds. It requires energy, time and space, as well as imagination. It also requires you to be open to new things and to be flexible.
Summer
Summer “life seasons” are about expansion, newness, opening doors and seeing things in your life change. Summers are often the product of a lot of hard work preceding them, and they tend to feel good.
You get a lot of validation, recognition and praise, as well as feeling like you are progressing and being productive. And they can be full of joy and happiness, too.
However, beware being overwhelmed, allowing your boundaries to be looser than they should be, and being exhausted with how much energy and how busy you are, so take them slowly and be aware of the need for self care.
Autumn
Your autumn “life season” tends to come at the end of a very busy productive period.
It is a time for you to breathe, understand and consolidate to allow those changes to be integrated.
Autumns often tend to feel more manageable in terms of speed and pace, as well as being a good time for self care and to consider how you can sustain changes long term.
Sometimes we can feel disappointed or confused when the brakes are put on life activity, but it is part of a natural cycle.
Winter
Winter “life seasons” are often the times when we feel frustrated or lost or confused. Maybe we have had a big life event like a relationship breakdown or health issues, and life is trying to help us to stop, so we can process all the emotions that we feel, and to learn life lessons.
It is a time when actually the more patience we have with ourselves, the more kindness we show ourselves as we reach out for friends who really make us feel supported.
We can feel stuck but it is helpful to reframe this as a period to consolidate and process, rather than get frustrated and try to push things before they are ready.